A Man Called Ove by Frederick Backman

We began by meeting two guests who joined us tonight because we were discussing “Ove.”  Everyone who was there enjoyed the book very much.  One of our members described herself as a grumpy old guy.  She said she identified with Ove.  One member especially loved the “cat annoyance” in the book.  Our discussion leader provided Swedish cookies and chocolates for the group.

Our leader shared the background of the book.  Fredrik Bachman got several rejections before the book was published.  He was thirty-one when the book was published.  The author pronounces Ove this way – oova.

The group agreed that Ove’s computer purchase in the first chapter shows his battle with the modern world.  He wanted to learn about the technology, but he did not want to be patronized.  We agreed that each person has a breaking point when asking for help.

Ove discovers he can be useful when he finds out his neighbors need him.  One member commented how much he liked the little girl drawing him in color.  We discussed the skills he had, like opening a jammed window, fixing a bike, and others.

One member mentioned she especially enjoyed the story of how Ove courted his wife.  Many in the group agreed.  The chances seemed slim he could actually find a wife the way he did.  But Sonja was intrigued by him.

A question we discussed was, “Why do you think the author revealed Ove’s past the way he did?”  One member felt it slowly helps the reader unravel the depths of his character.  We compared it to friendships, where people get to know each other by sharing their stories a bit at a time.

The group thought Ove appeared cranky because of his inner need to have things in order.  One of his core values is, “It’s what you do, not what you say.”  This and the ever present concern of “What would Sonja say?” pushed him to get out there and help.  Ove seemed more open to people if he had not previously disagreed with them.  The “white shirts” or rule makers, always made him feel helpless.

One member described Parveneh as persistent, genuine women who wants a grandfather for her children.  The realization that Ove was suicidal made her determined to help.  A member noted that Ove listens to her.

Ove tries to live his life like his father, but we noticed that he differs from his father in an important way.  He tries new things and meets new people.

Several members believed Ove has OCD.  He finds comfort in routine.  Lack of structure causes anxiety.  One member mentioned that routine can give you freedom.  Ove had a routine with Sonja even when they were both at work.  Routine gave Ove a purpose.

A member commented that by observing Ove’s behavior in the neighborhood, we saw the father he would have been.  Jimmy cares for Ove so much that he warms the cat, even though Jimmy has a severe cat allergy.

One of our members said she identified with Parveneh’s 3 year old.  Another commented about Ove’s identification of people by description, rather than name.  “The lanky one” is an example.

Ove’s sense of right and wrong eventually leads him to punching his nemesis, Tom.  Our members believed Tom deserved the punch.

The “cat annoyance” gives Ove someone to talk to.  He always felt the cat agreed with him.  Our group felt that Ove belonged to the cat.  In some ways, the cat took Sonja’s place and improved Ove’s mental health.

One member commented that Ove’s true personality is revealed when he can help other people.  Ove and Sonja had a true love story. She is his color.  After she passed away, he was often guided by the question, “What would Sonja expect him to do?”

We ended the discussion with some of our favorite Ove quotes.

                If anyone had asked him how he lived without someone, he didn’t.

                It wasn’t as if Ove died when Sonja did, he just stopped living.

                Something inside a man goes to pieces when he has to bury the only person who ever understood him.